How is my Ex Boyfriend Feeling During No Contact?
Men seemingly bounce back right away from a breakup, but is this all a façade? It is no secret that men and women process things differently, and a breakup is no exception. Men are emotionally wired differently from females, and this affects how men deal with breakups.
Feeling 1: Arrogance
Your ex's initial reaction to the breakup might be cold and disconnected. It will seem like he has "moved on." He doesn't show much remorse, guilt, or sadness. Instead, he might be behaving like he doesn't care, and he possibly doesn't. He has the "I'm an Alpha" mentality, but his bravado persona will last. Because here is a secret... breakups are actually tougher on men. What goes around comes around.
Warning: He will be unresponsive and uninterested in what you have to say, how you feel, or about the relationship you shared. He will be socializing and enjoying his freedom. Avoid stalking him on social media or actively trying to find out what he's up to. Stay in control of your emotions.
Feeling 2: Resentment
If you have been following the no contact rule, this means you have stayed silent. Your ex might start to feel resentful because he expected you to chase after him, and you haven't. He thought by now you would be begging for him back or telling him you miss him. Poor baby...he no longer feels "special", and his ego is bruised. Good!
Warning: Mr. Ex will get angry and try to pick a fight or hurt you in order to get a reaction from you. Don't bite on the bait. It's his way of trying to get control of the situation. Ignore...ignore...ignore. Any reaction you give him is still attention. He MUST NOT have the upper hand.
Feeling 3: Sadness
Men always have a tendency to want what they don't have, and once they get it, they don't want it anymore. The emotional delay has started to creep in. The newness of being single has now worn off. During this time, your ex will begin to feel the consequences of his actions. His life now is one big question mark. There's a hole in his life shaped like you, his ex-girlfriend, and he's trying to figure out how to fill it.
Warning: He might start messaging and texting different girls. He might like all their Instagram pictures or befriend them on social media. These over the top demonstrations of "moving on" can sometimes signal he's hiding the pain of the rejection. I guess the grass isn't always greener on the other side Mr.Ex!
Feeling 4: Remorse
He's starting to realize the grass isn't always greener on the other side. This is when he truly begins to regret his actions and understands that you are a woman of high value. He knows he messed up, and he is kicking himself for it. He is reflecting and realizing what he's lost.
Warning: Although he might feel regretful this doesn't mean he will reach out just yet. He will be silently watching you and still be waiting for you to break and contact him. Don't even think about it... you are a Girl with Game, and he has to work to get your affection and attention back.
Feeling 5: Denial
He is going back and forth in his mind about getting back with you. Though, he still believes that you cannot live without him. He is starting to view you as an unpredictable woman, but he still wants to cling to the control he had over you. He tells his friends," She will chase after me, you'll see." He still thinks you couldn't possibly be happy and move on with your life.
Warning: He might be contacting you in a sneaky way or leaving obvious hints on social media about him missing you. He wants to still have the upper hand and wants you to stroke his ego by validating his brilliance and specialness. Stay strong! You've got this.
Feeling 6: Panic
You have remained silent and haven't reached out to him. You are working on yourself and staying in control of your emotions. You are living life with passion and looking great while doing it. He is feeling blown away by your transformation during your separation.
By this point, he has recognized your value and importance. He has realized what he had was irreplaceable. He let you go, and now YOU have "moved on," and he can't believe that this is actually happening. He's lost his dream girl!
Warning: He needs to know that he cannot get you back with a click of a finger. This is where you hold all the power, so make him work for you.
If you would like to make your ex realize what he's lost, take this quiz and read our book "This Girl's Got an ex" for the best strategies and secret tips on how to have the upper hand during a breakup.